July 28, 2009

A BREAKDOWN MOMENT

I think I had a little breakdown moment today. :( First, I woke up late. I intended to wake up at 6:00 a.m., but instead I woke up at 8:15 a.m. My first class is at 8:30 a.m., and it takes me at least 30 minutes to drive to school, apart from showering and getting ready for the day. I completely missed my class, and this week is the last week before our Summer Vacation. Needless to say, I was very, very bummed and very, very mad at myself! :( Instead of going to school, I went to my local Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf intending to study. But before I could get out my steno machine, I checked Facebook quickly to see what my friends were up to. I haven't been on Facebook for several weeks now. I just don't have the time to keep up with everyone there! Anyway, when I browsed through all the status updates, photo uploads, and what have you, I got so sad all of a sudden! I realized that I miss my friends... terribly! I miss the days when I would literally be going out at least 3x a week with different groups of friends to meet up for dinner, coffee, birthday parties, or any kind of get-togethers. I was one of the people who initiated the movie dates, the girls nights, the luncheons on Sundays after church. Hmm... but this was when I placed school and responsibilities way, way back in my list of priorities. :P Well, that was about 3 years ago. Now, I'm 28-years-old, and I can't be fooling around any longer. It's no longer "cute." All that socializing without prioritizing on school has definitely caught up with me today, and I'm for sure paying the price. I wish I were already done with school, but my choices of yesterday has brought me to where I am now -- - Part-time work at a law office, including a full day every Saturday! - Full-time school at Tri-Community, plus studying every chance I can get! If I had the chance to do it all over again, I would have buckled down early with school to get it out of the way, so today I would have my career, no debt whatsoever, and planning more tangibly my future with my boyfriend. But I can't change the past. I am grateful, however, that I've learned my lesson. You really reap what you sow. So now I'm diligently sowing into my future, so I can reap the rewards when I'm finally licensed: - I'll finally have a career I love, not just a job to pay the bills! - I'll finally have money, so no more debt! No more living paycheck to paycheck! - I'll finally have a flexible schedule! (I want to freelance, do closed captioning, or CART reporting.) I get to go on vacations or visit family/friends or just take a little breather whenever I want to. Sorry if this post was a bit discouraging. That wasn't really my intent. The purpose for this post is to give tough love to myself (and I needed to vent)... and to you, if you need it. If you're a court reporting student who is just starting or who needs a bolt of encouragement, please heed these words (and I'm definitely talking to myself, too): Let's pay the price of going through school now! Let's work our butts off! Let's be the best shorthand reporters we can possibly be! Let's continue to put in our 150% effort day in and day out! For we WILL reap the rewards if we don't give up! NEVER GIVE UP!

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By: VintageVerses of Etsy.com